Greetings From The Afterlife

Greetings Mortals! I am James Douglas, Earl of Drumlanrig Castle and first in line to the Dukedom of Queensberry and I am dead. For the past 300 years I have been haunting Edinburghs Underground Streets in the Old Town since the unfortunate matter of my death in 1715. 

Too much of a good thing can kill you mortals. "Four warnings is the same as having four arms", is what I vaguely remember my dear father telling me on one of the few occasions we got to have a good blether. He of course, I presume, perhaps, maybe, was referring to the need for extra arms to hold his daggers to swat those reprehensible anti-unionist peasants that ran amok through Edinburgh back in 1707. I died from chronic obesity so if I had any extra arms they would be employed in the holding of another fork or two! Haha! Well perhaps that old saying doesn't relate to my pontificating but too much of a good thing can definitely kill you! Probably. I should think.

So now I have this fabulous new on-ternet journal where i can share my marvelous ghost stories with all my on-ternet friends who if i am honest with you don't appear to have much dress sense or even a single silver spoon in their collective mouth. Getting things down in writing can be a bit difficult when you are an illiterate imbecile kept in the  basement of Queensberry house but if i thought i had it bad then... Haha! Let me tell you mortals, after becoming a corporeal being doomed to relive my past misdemeanours for all eternity in a state of damnation and perpetual agony it has not got any easier! I can't even hold a quill!

However it's not all tombs and gloom mortals because through the goggles, wiglopedias, bogs, and whatever other new ologies the on-ternet has produced I find it very easy to get my thoughts to appear here. Just as well because they are bluidy important. Very bloody!! I have become a ghost writer! For myself! Geddit?

Forever yours,
James Douglas of Castle Drumlanrig
Cityofedinburghtours.com